One Mans Small Is Another Mans Big

They tell you when you start PT or visit with the Neurologist that improvement or change comes in baby steps. You will nod your head in agreement, but hope that the developmental milestones come sooner rather than later. Many times they do. Sometimes they don't.

Cash has now been receiving therapy for about 6 weeks. The first few times are pretty tough to see. Your parental instinct to comfort your baby is strong, and each time he cries you want to jump up and say "Stop!". You know whats best for him, so you allow it to continue. The therapist is pushing your child to do their best and that sometimes means a few tears. I equate it to an adult working out and grunting. It's no fun, but you know whats necessary for you to acheive your goals.

Four times a week, I witness my son screaming, breathing hard and the tears roll down his cheeks. Its just short of miserable, but the end goal makes it worth it. Our therapists are great, and they give Cash time to recover and after a bit, even they know when to say when. We are lucky to have them, good therapists are hard to find.

My pointing this out is not to gain sympathy, but to express how tough these days can be, sometimes. Then there are those amazing moments, like when your child lifts his head and turns it while on his belly. Most parents enjoy this as a typical milestone, expecting it to come in time. We may appreciate it more than most, considering it took about 40 hrs of therapy to reach that goal. Between the therapists four, one hour visits and our additional 30 min to hour workout we give Cash each day, it adds up. Think about Crossfit, or some other hardcore workout, then apply it to a 4 month old(corrected age) and consider it 7 days a week. Sometimes even more. It's a commitment, no doubt.

The little victories that we as parents experience with our children are memorable. The first crawl, the first bite, the first word etc. As a parent of a child with special needs, we get excited when the leg is moved up, before the crawl. One mans small, is another mans big.

Kimberley pulled out the first multiple head rotation while on his belly the other day. I'm glad it happened on her watch, I know that sometimes she feels a little in the dark in regards to therapy.
When these little miracles happen, I always go back to Cash' birth, the viability test and when the nurses started calling Cash Rocky. We've come a long way, but have a long road ahead.

I pray for the strength on those days I don't want to make the drive to PT, or those weeks of seemingly no change, to keep it up and stay positive. I guess I'll just hold my little warrior and wait for his smile, its better than coffee or a red bull. Cash provides the motivation, does the work and manages the shortcomings; all I have to do is encorage him. My job is easy.